If I Was Your Girl

If I Was Your Girl - Meredith Russo

As I was reading this novel, I kept thinking, what in the hell are you doing Amanda? I really thought she was overly confident and risky. I know she was finally becoming who she wanted to be but the pace at which was arriving at it with, was scaring the pants off me! Amanda was a new student, living in new surroundings, living with a father whom she really didn’t know, wearing a new identity and acting so carefree and flirty, I just about died. She had lived her whole life as Andrew and now after surgery and taking her medication, Andrew was now Amanda. With fire and gusto, she rushed into a romance for which I kept shaking my head. She found a friend named Bee, who was exciting and carefree. I could go on about Bee but I think Amanda put too much into Bee. I was glad that Amanda found other friends besides Bee and I only wished that she would have trusted these friends as much as she trusted Bee. Amanda realizes the reaction that she will receive when others find out the truth about her past which is why, she feels she must keep her past a secret. This secret can only be hidden for so long and what will become of her then?


I liked how the author told the whole story of Andrew and Amanda. With randomly inserted chapters, we were flashed back to when Amanda was Andrew, before he had the surgery. It told of the conflict that the family wrestled with over the years and of Andrew’s feelings as he coped with being a male.   The emotions of the parents felt realistic and genuine.   It made this novel more realistic to feel everyone’s’ side of the story.    Everyone has secrets and I wondered as I read along, just who would share their secrets with Amanda as she got more familiar with her new surroundings. Why do we feel that we need to share everything with the world to be accepted? What secrets should we keep from others and which ones do we need to share? At what point, do you open yourself up to others for their acceptance? I still believe she should have been taking things slower and being more cautious to her surroundings and then perhaps things might have transpired differently. I really enjoyed this novel. It is a novel that is more than just about gender issues.